[ ]Bad guy has facial hair
[ ]Dead family member
[ ]Bad guy “wants to deal with it myself”
[ ]“NOOOOOOOOO!!!”
[ ]Someone gets impaled
[ ]Someone gets a limb/head hacked off
[ ]Someone explodes
[ ]Someone dives out of the way of an explosion
[ ]“I want him alive”
[ ]Hard ass chick
[x]Runs out of ammo
[ ]“We got company”
[ ]Character that doesn't follow the rules
[xx]Wilhelm
[ ]Cocky douche bag
[ ]Someone/something farts,poops,pukes,gets hit in the junk, or gets some sort of bodily fluid -besides blood squirted,thrown,or splattered on them.
[ ]Bad guy has a theme song
[x]Token black guy
[x]Black guy dies first (in this case, black chick)
[ ]“Aw hell no”
[ ]SSSSLLLOOOWWW MMMOOOTTTIIIOOONNN!!
[x]Old man mentor
[ ]Animal/robot/sidekick for comedy relief
[x]Guy named Jack
[ ]Bad guy uses a pun
[ ]Crotchety old man
[ ]Midget
[ ]Monkey
[x]Uncomfortable scene where the cute guy/girl finds out unattractive friend wants to be more then friends or likes them more then a friend.
[ ]Bad guy laughs
[ ]Bad guy laughs at at his own stupid joke
[x]Character with a stupid name
[ ]That overused scene where the two characters almost kiss but get interrupted by something
[ ]Bumbling cops
[ ]Character misses chance to shoot bad guy because he is too busy staring or listening to what the bad guy is saying
[ ]Explanation via a chalkboard
[ ]“Last hope”
[ ]Morgan Freeman (in person or narration)
[x]Blonde in distress
[ ]“Shes gonna blow!”
[ ]Car/tank/other vehicle flies off a cliff, and then explodes
[ ]Henchmen waiting around and passing the time by talking to one another
[x]Character says something blatantly obvious
[x]Intro includes narrative back story
[x]Deus Ex Machina
[ ]Henchmen waiting around and passing the time by talking to one another
[x]Character says something blatantly obvious
[x]Intro includes narrative back story
[x]Deus Ex Machina
Cliches total- 12/45
Things I thought to myself while watching this movie:
"Why does this movie need two titles? Dragon Wars or D-War. Make up your mind."
"Apparently people who own bars in California dont realize that its illegal to serve booze to a 19 year old"
"Yes! Not only does the bad guy get hit by a car once, but twice!!"
"Exactly 59 minutes and 23 seconds into the movie, after the FBI knows there is a gigantic snake plowing its way through LA, after they mobilize forces to a cave where they tracked it down (it later escapes), and after it has climbed up the side of a building... the army FINALLY shows up."
Things I thought to myself while watching this movie:
"Why does this movie need two titles? Dragon Wars or D-War. Make up your mind."
"Apparently people who own bars in California dont realize that its illegal to serve booze to a 19 year old"
"Yes! Not only does the bad guy get hit by a car once, but twice!!"
"Exactly 59 minutes and 23 seconds into the movie, after the FBI knows there is a gigantic snake plowing its way through LA, after they mobilize forces to a cave where they tracked it down (it later escapes), and after it has climbed up the side of a building... the army FINALLY shows up."
The Drinking Game: T
ake a drink whenever the main guy has a blank look on his face when something exciting is happening. Take 2 drinks every time the token black guy provides an escape vehicle via an SUV.
Thoughts of the main character as it fades to credits: "Well shucks the chick is dead but hey I guess its for the good of all things. Now how am i supposed to get home from this undisclosed, post apocolyptic desert? Uh hey Token Black Guy you got another SUV?"
Quote: "You said it was big, not something that could swallow a bus!"
-Token Black Guy
Summarization of movie in one or two sentences:
Dragon Wars, a movie where up until an hour and 18 minutes in there are NO DRAGONS WHATSOEVER. The movie is an hour and 22 minutes long.
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